My Stance In Swear Words, Goshdarnit

I have give my thoughts previously about swear words. This is the Part II of it, and this time I won't hold back, so if you find any 'unmasked' vulgarities below, please bear in mind that they are solely for the purpose of explanation, not to piss off anybody.

Fuck you

Lets start with the most popular swear word, 'fuck'. I still don't understand why people, especially the Americans like to use this words all the time to describe almost everything. For example "That's fucking weird" or "There's so fucking many of them out there". Is the word 'fuck' an adjective to begin with? No, its a verb, an action, which means in the examples above, the word 'fuck' is being used in inappropriate situations. No, I must say the word fuck there is a mistake. Oh so stupid people who use it that way.



And there's another situation where people tend to use the word 'fuck' wrongly. For example "Fuck (insert some subject here)!". Usually it's used that way to show displease or hatred. But then again does that word being used properly here? Fucking is something that people, including me loves to do. I mean who doesn't like to fuck? So if fucking is something that feels good then why must people use it as swear words? Oh so stupid people who use it that way (again).



I'm far from finished. I'm pretty sure many of you have heard the phrase "holy shit". In terms of vulgarity level, it may be just below the word 'fuck' but it is still as stupid as using the word fuck in situations given above. Why stupid? Lets do some analysis word by word here. Holy is, as far as I know is similar to sacred. Shit is you know what, which is a total opposite of sacred. So why must those words have to be combined together as a mean to swear when they are contradicting each other. Oh so stupid people who use it that way (it will never end).



(4/7 people who like to use the swear word 'fuck' are actually unable to fuck and can't get laid - literally)

My Superhero's Special Power

If you were a superhero, what special power would I like to have? Before anything else I should ask myself what kind of superhero I'd like to be? The one with single superpower (like the X-Men) or the one with multiple superpowers (like Superman)? Lets perform some analysis first before I can decide any further.

Superheroes go shopping

Take a look at Superman. Aside from his stupidity of wearing the underwear on the outside, how many superpowers does he has? He is invincible, he can fly, he has this deadly heat ray coming out from his eyes, he can see through everything, and he can live in outer space vacuum (he can live without breathing! - not sure to what extent though). So how many superpowers are there? There are at least five! Even Spiderman has at least two superpowers (to cling at walls like spider and even can produce spider web just like spider, albeit from his wrists instead of his abdomen).



So what if I have at least 5 superpowers too? If I'm given the chance to pick and choose what kind of superpowers I'd like to have, then here are what they would be:



1. The power to create and destroy

With this power I can create something from nothing or vice versa (turn something into nothingness). In battle I can just defeat my enemies by destroying their existence down to the quantum level.



2. The power to pull and push things

This power is similar to telekinesis but only limited to draw things towards me or pushing them away from me. Useful to stop the bullets from hitting me (literally makes me almost invincible) and return them back to the people who shoots me. I can also use this power to fly and cling to walls/ceilings as well as disarming my enemies.



3. Remove superpowers from villains and turn them into good people

Yes, instead of engaging in unnecessary battles why can't just turn your enemies into good people? This is the superpower all superheroes need.



4. The ability to retrieve any publicly available information in real time without the need of mediums like books/internet.

Remember McGuyver? See how cool he was with all his knowledge to solve problems? Imagine where we're pushed to a dead end to find a solution and this is where this 'superpower' is really needed.



5. The power to make any girls/women to fall in love with me.

This is self explanatory. I mean which male superheroes doesn't have woman behind them, just like the saying "Behind every successful men, there's a woman". Besides, as far as I can remember, there's no gay superhero so far.



But everybody knows virtually any superheroes have weaknesses. Not even Superman is spared as he is also so damn weak against the cryptonite. So what about me? In fact all of my superpowers are also my major weaknesses. Here are the explanations:



1. Although I can create something from nothing and turn anything into nothingness, it only works that way. It's impossible for me to turn something into other things directly, like turning my enemies into piles of gold bars.



2. Like I said, the power to pull or push something is not really telekinesis because I can't exactly move things remotely from point A to point B, unless the point B is located in straight line from me to point A (I mean I can't remotely move things vertically or sideways but only back and forth). Besides this superpower is not as cool as teleporting.



3. I maybe can turn villains into good people but they will lost their superpowers in the process, which might have been useful if they turned into my allies. Not only that, the definition of "good people" here really depends on me, which means they might still a bad people to some other people even after all the process.



4. Knowledge like McGuyver is power but it only works if there are enough tools. Of course I can just create any tools that I need from nothingness but it's not 100% guaranteed that I'll make the accurate tools if I have little experience in the problems I'm going to solve. And knowing things doesn't mean I mastered them too.



5. To make any girls/women to fall in love with me, I need a notebook, I need to know their face and their name too. I'd need to write down their names and the reasons/situations before any romantic events could take place. There's no guarantee how long the relationship will last (it does not guarantee I'll have great sex), and it won't work if the female also has superpower (in other words, this power is only applicable to normal females).



Actually I'd like to use the notebook (like the manga "Death Note") for my superpower #3 but you know villains always disguised themselves in costumes like superheroes too so there's no way I could know instantly their true identity without engaging myself in battles first (take note that their true identity is not publicly available so I can't use my superpower #4 either). So if I really need to avoid any battles, turning them straight away into good people is the only choice I can make.



(1/2 female villains fell in love with me after first encounter. The other half committed suicide)

My Dream House

This is about the home of my dream. Everybody has their own dream home, I mean who doesn't? People has always dreaming a perfect and ideal home for their life, even if it does not appear to be 'perfect' to other people. Perfect here doesn't have to be 100% because for most people, what they need is a "just enough" home with roof, and rooms, as long as it does provide a shelter for them. Here is mine. Read on.

Borudjerdis' House (Kashan)

I have three kind of dream houses. The first one is a double-storey detached house with a special design, combination of American and Japanese style. American design being adopted here is the underground water cooling system, the use of insulation layer in the walls (to keep the house cool from the heat of tropical climate here) and the 'gateless' frontage, where guests and visitors can go straight to my doorstep instead of ringing the bell from outside of the gate. I feel it's friendlier that way for them. For the cars, instead of parking them in the car porches, I'll park them in the garage, just like what the Americans do.



For the Japanese style, I'd like to adopt their distinctive doorway/hallway/corridor style. Unlike the Americans, we Asian does not bring shoes inside the house and leave them at the doorstep. However there's one thing that separates the Japanese from the rest of other Asians are who leave the shoes outside the house, the Japanese have special place for shoes inside the house, located just behind the main door. That's what I'm talking about. And I don't mean to leave our local house design. The kitchen will be made completely separated from the living room, and restrooms will not share the same place with bedrooms.



Speaking about bedrooms, I prefer there to be at least 4 bedrooms to be ideal. The master bedroom for mom and dad, one room for the boys, one room for the girls and another room reserved for the guests. For rest rooms, I'd like to make two sets of them. What I mean by 'set' here is one room will be consisted of separate three parts; toilet, bathroom and 'washroom'. For other cultures, washroom may be the same as toilet but for the local people here it is where we do general washings that is not related to bathing. Last but not least, in a tropical country here, a roof ventilator is a must to complement the underground water cooling system I mentioned earlier.



So where I would like to place the house? I am dreaming of a peaceful neighborhood with friendly neighbors, and I can virtually get everything I want just from a stone-throw away, or at least a walking distance to the stores that can provide me almost everything that I need (from anime, manga, games, computers, software, books, foods, clothes, etc.). It would be better too if it's within a walking distance from my workplace, and since I'm the online-type person, a free public wifi access is a plus point as well. It may not offer the best quality but it's free and at least I can stay online most of the time without having to worry about the expensive internet bills.



Here is my dream house number two. It is an apartment in the middle of the city, where I can have a beautiful kaleidoscopic night view of the city from the windows. The apartment doesn't have to be a luxury one, even a cheap one with just one bedroom (with own kitchen and restroom) for a bachelor like me is enough (I can convert the living room into a bedroom for guests if there's a need to), or three bedrooms for family people. I'm also fine if it's just a residential floor in a 3 or 4-storey shophouse unit. Just like my dream house number one above, I'd appreciate it if there's a free public wifi access so I can cut the expenditure for the internet.



And since it's in a middle of a city I'd prefer it to be as close as possible to a convenience store. I'd want a 24-hours convenience store too but yeah this kind of store always sell their goods at more expensive price. A shopping complex within a walking distance is a good thing to where I can do window shopping whenever I feel like it. I'll need a hypermarket nearby too to buy fresh ingredients/foods. Also a restaurant (preferably a 24-hours one), a hardware store and a laundry shop is a must too, because I'll definitely need them.



Lastly for my dream house number three (the most unrealistic one), it is a small mansion on a parcel of land with an area no less than a football/soccer field. Yes, a piece of land enough to build a medium-sized stadium would be ideal. In the middle of the land there is the 4-storey house building with at least four rooms (for various purposes including bedrooms and workspace) in each floor. There will be numbers of maids and butlers to serve me, and enough bodyguards to keep an eye for my security. I have drivers and cars to take me to virtually any destination I want. In front of the mansion there are gardeners tending to keep the big landscape beautiful all year long. There are also small ponds and fountains at both left and right side of the house. Finally, a private swimming pool behind the house where I can dive in whenever I like or I can just organize a swimsuit party there every weekend.

How I Feel About Swear Words, Goshdarnit

Some people love to swear. For others it makes them cringe. So where do I stand, and why?

When only swearing will do

I like to categorize swearing into two categories; acceptable swearing and unacceptable swearing, depending on the level of harshness and vulgarity of the swearing words. For the acceptable ones, they are the less vulgar words such as 'damn' and "holy crap", which I'm fine with and don't really mind if people using them. In fact I also may use it sometimes. The unacceptable ones are of course the vulgar words including the overused 'f***' word, 'bull sh1t' and a few others (including hand signal as depicted in the picture above) that I can't afford to use here (even I have to mask them with asterisks and l33t in order to use them here).



So you think swearing is cool? I never think so, in fact swearing to the point that it becomes the daily occurrence in someone's life makes him/her look bad, if not being bad him/herself. I just don't understand why people, especially the Americans like to swear so much. I believe everybody was taught by their parents to "mind our language" when we were kids but why change as we grow older? Doesn't that means we're 'betraying' our parents?



People should stop making swearing (I mean the use of vulgar words) as an acceptable act, and never adopt it as a modern culture. What kind of culture that approves badmouthing? And have any of you ever think why swearing is called 'badmouthing' in the first place? Because, yes, it's bad. Some of you may think there's nothing bad about swearing but didn't your parents told you so when you were kids? And would you say it's not a bad thing to your kids? If you can't say swearing is a GOOD thing to begin with, then stop being hypocritical about it and stop swearing (again, the use of vulgar words) right away, right now.



(6/13 people who think their life sucks swearing at each other and think doing so will make their life better)

The Movie That Moved Me

If you think you're a big fan of Bruce Lee, I can say you're not until you learn more about Ip Man. I mean a real Bruce Lee's fan should know who Ip Man is and if you don't then be prepared Bruce Lee's ghost will hunt you and choke you to death.

Ip Man (may also spelled as "Yip Man" in Romanized Chinese) is a Chinese martial art (kung fu) movie and the title of the movie itself is after the name of the main role, a wealthy-yet-humble man named Ip Man, the most celebrated grandmaster of wing chun kung fu style in modern time.



As a fellow martial artist who have respect in Bruce Lee, I've always interested in knowing who is the person Bruce Lee learned his kung fu skills from. It seems like Ip Man is a forgotten legend because the first time I heard his name is around 15 years ago. Internet was still in its infancy on that time, and so does Google and Wikipedia so I was left in ignorance until year 2000 where me and a few of my friends in martial art class involved in a project to study the cause of Bruce Lee's death. Then I heard about a biographical movie "Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story" starring Jason Scott Lee and watched it (that's 7 years after the movie was released). Although the movie did not portray Ip Man as the man who trained Bruce Lee, the movie did remind me to look for him again. Lucky me the internet was already there and my search begins.



In the last 10 years, I was wondering why hasn't anybody make a biography movie about Ip Man? I keep wondering and finally in 2008 somebody is generous enough to make a movie about it at the right time everybody is still has the hots for martial art movies. A sequel titled "Ip Man 2" followed in 2010.



The movie has an awesome martial art features and not just focusing on wing chun. For example in the first movie we can see Ip Man fighting the Japanese soldiers whose practicing karate while in the second movie, we can see Ip Man having a head to head fight with a Western boxing champion. What amuses me the most is how well wing chun is depicted in the movie, thanks to Ip Man's own sons, Ip Chun and Ip Ching who act as advisors. Due to this I was able to see wing chun is quite similar to two martial art syles I've learned before, namely Silat Cekak Ust. Hanafi and Lian Padukan. Even the training is almost similar, except that I never have a touch on the wooden stacks.



For those who think this movie is really based on Ip Man's real life, take note that you're wrong. Apart from the names, fighting styles and the young Bruce Lee introduced at the end of the second movie, almost everything in the movie are fictional. However the movements in the movie aren't fakes. They are well choreographed by the trained wing chun pros, so in that sense this movie will not disappoint. And since wing chun incorporates almost no jumps, jumping is almost nowhere in the movie, which also means that wire works is almost non existent too (I didn't say there aren't any though).



So what's about this movie is great? I personally think it's a good introductory movie for those who are interested to know and learn martial art. Alright, I said 'introductory' so please don't rely on this movie to practice wing chun yourself. I do admit though many of the kung fu moves you see in the movie are effective but you should never learn martial art solely from any movies. If you want to learn some, go look for a real master. Although wing chun is relatively easy to learn, it doesn't mean it's easy to master without somebody to guide you.



Although this move did moved me to focus more in martial art training, it does not really moved me to learn wing chun myself. Besides since I found wing chun is quite similar to the styles I've learned before, I think it would be best for me to master what I already know rather than going for something new for now. Well, even if I wanted to chances are it would be very hard since real (full time) wing chun practitioners here is almost as rare as chicken's teeth.



(11/24 westerners think all kung fu are the same and think any Chinese-looking people knows how to kick someone's ass artistically)

The Movie That Moved Me (part II)

Ong Bak is a Thai movie starring Muay Thai martial artist Tony Jaa which released back in 2003. Since then another 2 movies under the same title has been released (Ong Bak 2 in 2008, followed by Ong Bak 3 in May this year, but all movies does not related in any way in each other, except for the presence of Ong Bak, the Buddha sculpture being the subject of attention).

So why did this movie affect me so much? It's because I'm a martial artist myself, and I did learn some Muay Thai (locally called tomoi/tomoy) in year 2000. Actually on that time I do personally felt that there's no more hope for martial art movies. Yes, there were still many of the so-called martial art movies from Hong Kong and Japan but as a martial artist, I was able to tell that most of them are fakes. Why? Because many of the fighting scenes rely too much on wire works, not to mention the excessive amount of acrobatics that is pretty much unnecessary and does not have any great effects in real fights. To make it worse, it is performed by actors who does not really practice any martial art in real life and rely solely on fighting choreographers for the fighting scenes.



As far as I can remember the last "almost true" martial art movie I watched is the "Once Upon A Time in China" starring Jet Li. I said almost here because like many stereotypical martial art (kung fu) movies from Hong Kong, wire works are still utilized albeit not as heavily done as in most other movies due to the fact that Jet Li still performed genuine fightings in the movie. I also like another notable Jet Li's kung fu movie, "Fong Sai Yuk".



In the first 10 years of my life, I enjoyed watching some Bruce Lee's movies as well as Jackie Chan's movies from the 70's. Even on that time I managed to tell Bruce Lee is lacking the 'art' factor in his kung fu since he have discarded many elements he deemed as unnecessary despite he was a wing chun kung fu student. However, his fighting scenes are genuine at least, as claimed by Jackie Chan who did appear in some of Bruce Lee's movies, thus I have a respect on him.



Jackie Chan on the other hand, is another kung fu star but I like his 70's kung fu movies more compared to those in the recent years. I mean in the past the kung fu he depicted in his movies look more genuine but as many of you can see today, he is still a good martial artist but his fighting scenes now are mostly comprised of stunt actions. By the way in the sense of martial art, I still respect him.



After the era of Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan and Jet Li, I started to see a major decline in martial art movies. Although both Jackie Chan and Jet Li made more appearance in Hollywood after that, like I said it's not enough because like I said, Jackie Chan is more into stunt actions rather than real kung fu these days, while for Jet Li, his kung fu is badly depicted thanks to CG and SFX interventions (don't believe me? Go watch "The One" now). I thought there's no more hope for martial art movies, until...



In 2003, the world witnessed the emergence of a new breed of martial art star. If in the past martial art movies was dominated by kung fu (thanks to Hong Kong movie industries) now it's the time for South East Asia's martial art. Enter Muay Thai, popularized by the movie Ong Bak I introduced earlier. The story may not 'strong' enough to attract everybody but I believe this is a movie everybody who think they're martial artist should watch. I can guaranteed you everything (fighting scenes) you see in this movie are genuine, and there are no wire works at all. That is what I call martial art movie. In many ways this movie has moved me to focus more on martial art practice and I thanks to it now I'd like to meet Tony Jaa in person not as a fan but as a fellow martial artist.



After Ong Bak, I've seen a favorable rise of interest and demand in martial art movies. Their future is now brighter and since then we've seen a major increase in number of GENUINE (no fake fighting scenes) martial art movies, not only from Thailand but also other parts of South East Asia like Indonesia, Malaysia and Philippines. Even Hong Kong, Korea and Japan have followed suit by featuring more martial art or kung fu movies that utilize more genuine fightings and less faking it. I'm not against the use of real fighting movements because I know a true martial artist won't inflict permanent damage to each other since they are professionals who really know what they're doing. In other words, true martial artists won't have problems performing in real martial art movie like Ong Bak.



(9/14 people who watched martial art or kung fu movies think kicking someone's ass in an 'artistic' way is a lot cooler than doing it like a cowboy)

The Movie That Moved Me

Alright, it's "The Lord of The Rings" trilogy. Um, they're not really 'moved' me but they did it indirectly though. I mean it's the secondary effect of the movie that moved me instead of the movie itself.

So how did this movie affect me? Well since I have limited English I always feared of English books, including the original novel of The Lord of The Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien. In that sense, this movie is a godsend to allow me to enjoy the story without having to actually read the book. Besides I don't really like the idea of having to virtually imagine how things are going on in a novel, any novel and not just LOTR. That's why I love manga more, because inside a manga, things are already in graphical appearance, which means when reading manga my brain doesn't need to do extra work for visualizing the story so I could save more "processing cycle" to enjoy the story more.



So what's so great about the movie? I admit that I like fantasy stuff like this. However there's almost nothing that I like about this movie but I just like to see some interesting and silly things like people living with other 'races' like elves, hobbits, dwarves, orcs, goblins, etc. And what's the difference between hobbits and dwarves anyway? They're both short. And elves are very limited in their hairstyle because they need to show off their pointy ears all the time. And I wonder how do they describe young and old in elf community (apart from a child and an adult) when everybody is immortal? And what kind of planet is Middle-Earth actually? Those questions keep running in my mind until right now.



So should I recommend other people to see it? I don't think I should though because I can tell not many people around me would want to watch it considering how their mindset work. No, I'm not looking down on them and I know they're not into this kind of thing (the fantasy, magics, imaginary creatures, all would seem to be childish to those people).



(38/55 people who have watched LOTR believe the events in the movie did took place on actual Earth many ages ago)

If I Could Relive Any Day of My Life

Everybody have their own regrets. However that is not the only reason who people would want to relive their past. Some might want to re-experiencing the happiest moment in their life. Some others might just never had enough of the previous events. Thinking about reliving our past maybe stupid, childish and just a wishful thinking because it's impossible to go back in time but it doesn't mean it's a waste of time to do so. It's just one of many ways for people to reflect on themselves.

Ieri e oggi, Yesterday and today, young and old

If I'm given the chance go back and relive one day of my life, I think it would always be yesterdays, regardless what day I'm currently in. To be honest, regretting mistakes that happened the day before is my daily occurrence, almost like a routine. It doesn't necessarily big or small mistakes but a regret is still a regret. You know, I always screwed up things, that's why I wish I could go back in time and fix those 'errors'. Don't tell me I'm like a loser that also applies to everybody. Everybody makes mistakes and nobody can escape from that 'curse' either.



Now that I think about it, wouldn't it be interesting if I could relive my yesterday's life, and the next day after that (which is supposed to be today) I got the chance to go back again? That makes me think going back one day is the perfect choice because I won't have to wait for too long for another chance like this and I shall repeat the process until I think I've had enough. Well, that is only if the chance to go back still available after I go back in time though. After all, who in the right mind wouldn't want to correct their own mistakes?



(8/35 attempts to go back in time always failed, while the rest just give up on trying)

This Poem Is Brought to You By the Letter 'S'

Damn this is the most difficult blogging task I ever have. Write a poem using only words that start with "s"? What the...? It would be easier if it's in Malay but to do that in English is quite a challenge for me with my limited English. Alright, I'll accept the challenge. So when I think about multiple 'S', the first thing that came up in my head is the triple-S. Surely this would ring a bell for many anime fans like myself. And now the (simple) poem is ready. Read on.

'S.S.S.' sounds so super



That's all and I hope that's enough because I couldn't think of any more than that right now. So what is that SSS stands for? Like I said it would only sounds familiar among anime fans, or particularly Angel Beats! fans. If you watch the series, you'll find the SSS is the name of a high school 'club' inside. The SSS is a short for Shinda Sekai Sensen (死んだ世界戦線) or literally Afterlife Battlefront. Go watch the series if you haven't. Believe me it's awesome.

My Neighbor(s)

A poem to my neighbors. I could have wrote more but 10 lines seems to be most I could do right now with my limited English.

Colorful hillside neighborhood in Lisbon, Portugal in the morning sun

O my neighbors you all are kind,

Even if I make noise you won't mind,

To the left Mr. Ayub always with his cats,

Did you know that I'd love to keep them as pets?

Since they alway come by jumping over the gates,

To the right Ms. Siah the young widow,

Has fair bright white skin like snow,

But I have a girlfriend better keep my sight low,

O my neighbors you all are kind,

I'm writing this hope you don't mind.



(1/3 of my neighbors don't mind since they don't speak English while the rest just don't give a damn about this post)

The Best Advice I Ever Received

Just like quotes, I rarely (almost never) abide to people's advices. It's not that I'm selfish or what but I take them as a mere suggestions, which means in the end things will always depend on myself, and luck, and even God's intervention (if you atheist people out there are laughing at me because I believe in God, then you are wrong). And more often than enough, people thought they're giving advice to me although they were just shoving their ideals upon me.

Advice

Anyways, this is one of the best advices I ever received, "A good relationship must based on mutual give and take". This advice can be viewed from both positive and negative side. For example, we may think a relationship like that is insincere or hypocritical because a payback is expected, but on a positive note, a payback is always necessary in order to make the relationship healthy a.k.a. symbiotic instead of parasitic. Isn't it better if both parties win, right?



Like I said earlier, advice is more of a suggestion, because it's always based on one's past experiences. However one thing people should note is, if it works on you it doesn't mean it will work on others too. Also if you think you might have better solution to certain problems than other people, think again. I'm not against giving advice but before doing so, we should do enough assessment about it and not ending up forcing others to follow our ways.



Now what if I put a little twist to the 'advice' I received above? "Give and take advice to and from each other". That would be better because advice won't work if it only goes one way. And even if we think we really need to give advice, please remember this; try to do so in good intention for the sake of everybody, also do it with patience because it's normal if people don't listen to you on the first time. And here comes another good advice, "Never give up".